How to Stop Being Shy and Start Dating

If you’re shy, dating will really be something you struggle with as a guy.  Girls are expected to be more passive, but guys really need to stop being shy if they want any degree of success in dating.

Overcome Shyness and Start Dating

Don’t worry, I know exactly where you’re coming from.  I used to be really shy.  In fact, I was so shy that most of the people I went to high school with don’t even know who I am.  Everyone just saw right through me back then.  Things got a little better in college, but I didn’t really try to stop being shy until I found myself dumped by my girl friend with only one friend in the world.

Something had to change.

This is what I did, and I’m going to recommend you do it too if you want to stop being shy and finally have some social confidence:

You’re going to start getting outside of your comfort zone.  We’re going to make this progressive so don’t worry about getting thrown into the deep end too soon.

The first thing I did was I decided that I was going to simply say “hello” to 100 strangers in a week.  This seems like a lot of work at first.  In fact, if you’re as shy as I used to be, this will seem like quite a terrifying feat.  But please bear with me.

Keep a small index card with you to keep track of how many people you said “hello” to.  The first few times will feel really weird, but don’t give up.  After a few times, it will get easier.

Greet people walking down the street or waiting for a bus or in line at the deli.  Just simply say “hello” without any expectations of how they might respond.  How they respond says nothing about you.  You’re just being friendly.  Remember that.  How they respond only speaks about what kind of person they are.  If you say “hello,” then consider it a victory no matter how they respond.

What we’re doing here is slowly getting used to the idea of reaching outside of yourself and interacting with people.  We’re also teaching you one of the most important things you’ll learn in order to stop being shy, which is to separate yourself from how people react to you.

When you’re done with the first week, make your goal on the second week to start a conversation with twenty people.  Keep the same mentality and just strike up something simple by making comments about things you notice.  Try “Oh, that’s a nice tattoo.  What does it mean?” or “Hey, what book is that you’re reading?”

Again, we’re getting you to stop being shy by reaching outside of your own comfort zone.  Don’t worry about talking to girls that you want to date.  Talk to anyone and everyone.  If you can perfect this skill on guys and seniors, then you’ll be ready to be friendly and social when it counts–when you see a girl you want to meet.

This is how I trained myself to stop being shy.  It will really work if you stick to it.  So commit to taking two weeks to start reaching outside of your comfort zone.  It may seem scary at first, but I promise you that the fear goes away after awhile and, believe it or not, it will actually become fun to meet new people.

Overcome Shyness and Start Dating

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